| reading night |
[Oct. 4th, 2007|08:36 pm] |
It used to be that Thursdays I would get together with Brenda and goof-off on the dance floor. No lesson, nothing planned, just dance to whatever was playing and have fun. Sadly, for the last two months our schedules never meshed and it has gone the way of the Dodo.
I did try to call a few people to see what they were doing. Just hang-out or get a bite to eat or something. But, with no response... I've showered, made myself a tall Parrot Bay, and will be reading (need to finish "The Wyrd Sisters" ang get it back to Ben). As I sit here, I'm glad no one replied because my body is very tight from WDL rehersal last night. (I need a massuse)
I am half tempted to accept ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) sailmonger's group invitation to watch movies at her place tomorrow night. It would be cool, kinda like a second DFN. But, at the same time do I really want to hang-out with these people who live in a different world?
That's all for now |
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| ouch |
[Oct. 2nd, 2007|02:17 pm] |
I am still in pain.
I didn't get a chance to post about Sunday evening rehersal at WDL. Lisa, the choreographer, is a few cards short of a full deck. You would not believe the 'Cirque du Solie' acrobatics she wants average people to do on stage. Anyway, I really likked my knees and thighs attempting to do Russian Knee Slide/Walks.
It was hard going to the Gym Monday morning, but I did and had a nice work-out on a new machine because all the "good" ones were taken. I tried to lift weights, but was in a poor mood and didn't (need to find a work-out buddy). Popped ibuprophen (IB) all day and tried to stretch when I could (it was a busy driving day). My plan for after work was to go grocery shopping since I couldn't make rehersal due to my altered work schedule. kathlen99 called and went to the store with me. It turns out she needed food not only for herself, but to make cheez-balls for a wedding this weekend (she doesn't have a car). side note: woo-hoo, I found london broil steaks, buy 1 get 1 free
I slept until 10:30a this morning, so I missed the gym. My thighs and knees are still aching, sore, pain. More IB, took vitamins, stretched... I feel like crap. |
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| weekly schedule |
[Oct. 1st, 2007|03:14 pm] |
| Monday | Tuesday | Wednesday | Thursday | .Friday. | Saturday | Sunday |
Gym
9a-11aWork
1p-9p Homework
?-? | Gym
9a-11aWork
12n-8p DFN
8p-12m | Class
9a-12nWork
12n-8p WDL
8p-10p | Gym
9a-11aWork
12n-8p ???
?-? | ?Gym?
9a?-11a?Work
12n-8p ??? | ??? RHPS
8p-3a | ??? WDL
6p-9p | |
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| this (sex), that (sex), and other stuff (more sex) |
[Sep. 30th, 2007|10:50 am] |
Friday evening, kathlen99 cooked spaghetti at her place and I brought fixings for salad and a few extras. It was very good. For some strange reason, I always feel that food tastes better when someone else cooks it. I offered a few suggestions for going out afterwards. But, we both crashed on the couch and watched "Labyrinth"... she is in love with David Bowie, and I am in love with Jennifer Conelly :P
Saturday afternoon. I should have been productive with researching business, homework, or just basic household chores. But, I sat on the couch playing with my Adobe Video Editor and created a video slide-show of the FDO cast (I don't know how to embed, so follow the link)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mFSNotZ2GaM
Doke was not home for pre-show stuff at 8pm. So, after calling a few people (and getting no response), I hung-out with tehjabberwock10 at her dorm room. She is a nice kid. However, she seems to enjoy talking about sex, yet making it blatantly obvious that it will never involve me. Don't take this the wrong way, because sex is available to me. But, it feels... insulting... to hear someone talk to me about any issue that brazenly excludes me specifically. Luckily, she lets me fondle her ass and tits so it all balances out.
This is not the only time I made to feel uncomfortable last night. There was a moment when (unitentional) physical affections were expressed to me from someone whom I had openly expressed a desire, yet had not been reciprocated before. This person is not aware of what they did and I truly believe they don't realize what they did to me. But, it was awkward and strange and... well, I don't know the words to express my feelings about it.
Yes, I know I am being vague. It's because they read this journal and I don't want to create more issues. But, many people were curious about my attitude last night, and that is why. (Reason #3 I want to start a second, anonymous journal for myself) Sadly, this is not the first time. If it happens again, I will talk to the individual about it.
On a more positive note (maybe?) GADZOOKS! I wanna F*%# Jade. I really, really wanna have her for a whole night and half-way though the next day. (I shouldn't have let her do the domination with me at Doke's)
With only 4 hours of sleep, I am at Mom's house doing laundry.
I will post my schedule later. |
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| Yay??? |
[Sep. 27th, 2007|09:06 pm] |
As you read in my journal, yesterday I was asked to shift my hours to work from 2pm-10pm. This would have given me extra runs to the airport ( equals x-tra money ). The last pick-up from the airport tonight was supposed to be 9pm, which would have gotten me back to the garage in perfect time to leave at 10p. However, the flight is now delayed and will not arrive until 10:30p. Yes, I will be getting some overtime. But, it kinda sucks to know that I will be up late and have to re-adjust my sleep and morning routine and not be able to do house chores that need to be done.
Yay???
Last night at WDL rehersal, I really needed to cut my tongue out. I was watching the choreographer try to show krausemouse and Brian what she wanted them to do for their Tango routine... OMG!!! WTF!!! ok, it wasn't that bad. But,I really had to clasp my hand over my mouth to stop my interrupting with my input. She was showing them what she wanted done, but not teaching them to dance. There is a BIG difference. Without the technique and style, all of the movements (no matter how exciting) look like crap. I did say one thing to help Brian move a little easier around the floor. But, after that, I left to keep from being a butt-in-ski. However, I did mention to krausemouse that if we find free-time during rehersal, we should work on their movement.
Edit: the flight is now delayed until 11:15p. I think I will milk this drive to get as much time as I can, and blame it on waiting for luggage and construction on I-95 |
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[Sep. 26th, 2007|07:38 pm] |
I had to wear a suit to work today because I had to drive the limousine to the airport to pick-up a VIP and her helpers. As it turns out, the VIP took a later flight. So I met the two assistants at the baggage terminal. One was a tall white man. The other was a petite asian girl. While waiting for the luggage, the man's wife and kids show-up to suprise him. Because of some change in their family schedule, she ran to the airport to get him. So, in the end, I am driving this asian girl home in a large limo. When I put her bags into the trunk, she opens one and pulls out some clothes before getting into the back. As I start the car and pull away, I see in the rear view mirror, through the OPEN partition (the divider between the driver and passengers that can be open or closed for privacy), that she had stripped naked and was in the process of changing |:O I can only guess that she assumed the double-tinted windows in the back provided privacy all around. I pushed the button to close the partition and she did a startled jump and gasp. When we arrived at her house, she asked if I saw her change. I nodded and she appologized. Appologized????
GIRLS, there is no need to appologize when you expose yourself. In fact, we would greatly appreciate it if you did it more often >:)
Change in schedule:
| Thursday |
Gym
9a-11aWork
2p-10p |
yeah, my supervisor needs me to work late and pick-up 2 extra airport runs (more money for me. but, not overtime)
That's all for now. |
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| schedule |
[Sep. 24th, 2007|10:06 am] |
| Monday | Tuesday | Wednesday | Thursday | .Friday. | Saturday | Sunday |
Work
12n-8pWDL
8p-10p Homework
?-? | GYM
9a-11aWork
12n-8p DFN
8p-12m | Class
9a-12nWork
12n-8p WDL
8p-10p | GYM
9a-11aWork
12n-8p Homework
?-? | GYM
9a-11aWork
12n-8p ??? | ??? RHPS
8p-3a | ??? WDL
6p-9p | |
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| getting lazy again |
[Sep. 24th, 2007|09:51 am] |
I've not been to the gym for two weeks. The first week I was busy. The second week... I could have made the time if I really tried. Now, this morning, I was just lazy and didn't go. This is not good. I am down to 300 lbs (from the 330 I was in June). I just need to watch my diet more/again. I think eating only when I am really hungry helps a lot. But, it also leaves me in situations where I feel light-headed. I dunno... just typing random thoughts again.
Last night was FUN! Went to Korner Diner after dance lessons with some people and had a great time.
That's all for now. |
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| I forgot how good it can feel |
[Sep. 22nd, 2007|07:16 pm] |
I learned long ago that by taking a cool shower in the summer (with a quick dousing of just cold water at the very end) can help to beat the heat at any time of the day or night. So, for the last 4 months, the hot water in my shower has barely been touched.
Even though today was not a cold day compared to the recent weather we have been getting, my roommate did have the AC running and made the apartment a tad chilly. When I went to get cleaned-up for Rocky Horror tonight, I used a little more of the hot water than I had been. Then I used a little more... and a little more, until I eventually aquired steaming hot water from the nozzle. MMMMmmmmmm, that's nice. I must have stood there for at least 15 minutes, enjoying the cascade of heat.
Now, I just want to sleep forever.
Alas, I must finish dressing, gather my costuiming, and go to Doke's |
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| Friday trip to Greenville, PA |
[Sep. 22nd, 2007|02:59 pm] |
There is a Rocky Horror cast in Greenville, PA... that is having a lot of trouble finding and keeping castmembers. So, they have called on FDO to help them occasionally on Friday nights. Last night was the first time I went with a group to assist with a show. It was both fun and irritating.
We were supposed to leave my apartment at 9:30. Amy, Kira, Rob, and Tamara in my car and Ron w/ Ty in his. But, due to various issues (including my own forgetfulness) we probably didn't hit the road until 10. But, I don't think this made much of a difference because as soon as we crossed the state line on 95N, we hit severe traffic. I knew there would be some constructon. But, I didn't know where or how much. We sat on 95 for over an hour and only moved about 3 miles. Make-up and costume changes were made in the what little cramped space could be found. Once we were on 476N, it was all clear. However, we were still very late for the show.
We arrived at the theatre around 12:30 and the manager had decided to start the movie since no one could estimate our arrival time. We walked-in during the wedding scene and ran to take our places. It was a newly renovated, one-screen theatre... with little space to move. I was lucky to be able to stand in the back for a while and shout AP lines until it wa time for Eddie. Despite the lack of "stage" area and no blocking practice for this place. I can say that things went OK. Unfortunately, due to my forgetting my playing Dr.Scott earlier, I didn't grab all the costuming I needed and looked very poor for the role. Everyone there was very nice. It took some time to sort through what belonged to who at the end, but we finally got out around 2:30am and went to a local diner with one of the cast... I can't remember their name of their cast.
On the way home, I took the wrong exit in PA and got on an expessway with no opportunity to turn around. I was really pissed-off at myself for that... and pissed off a PennDOT for not having any exits or turn-arounds. So, we drove about 30 minutes out of the way to an area north of Exton before hitting 202 to get back to DE. I think we were back to my apatment at 5am.
Overall, it was nice to spend time and chat with cast members.
I slept until 1pm today (saturday). Been doing internet stuff and watching movies. Probably sit-around till time for Doke's house (maybe practice B&B for WDL).
I am Riff tonight.
There is no WDL rehersal on Sunday. So, I will probably go to Dance lessons at 7pm. There wasn't supposed to be a herhersal on Monday either. But, we've been called-in for a special music practice or something.
I might take a cue from sophiabrat and post a table of my schedule.
That's all for now. |
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| an old, disturbing feeling re-newed |
[Sep. 20th, 2007|11:07 am] |
A few years ago, (some of you will remember this story) when I was getting my lifeguard certification, many of the participants were teenagers. After a rescue lesson in the pool, we had changed clothes and returned to the classroom. When one of the younger girls walked into the room, with her arms full of books and equipment, her sweatpants dropped down to her knees. She was only wearing a tiny thong, and at the time this disturbed me a lot. I had a lot of trouble dealing with what I saw and the sexual emotions I felt. It is one thing to joke about underage sex, it is completely different to actually find it appealing and arousing. I was very disgusted with my own mind. Thankfully I had a friend, Dr. Caryn Wertheim, who was able to help me move past the loathing I felt towards myself and put everything into perspective.
Working with the WDL production of B&B, has put me in a situation that makes me feel uncomfortable again. I hate to be snide to the teens I have to interact with, but the way they dress and behave at times is just plain wrong for their age. Regrettably, it is not just them, it is also me and some... (for lack of a better word) temptations.
Eyes forward, focus on your blocking, remember your lines and cues. That's about all I can do for myself.
Am I wrong? |
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| is this how they felt? |
[Sep. 19th, 2007|01:15 am] |
When I was younger (no dinosaur jokes please), my girlfriends were very few and very far between. However, I always had female friends who would always irritate me with the phrase, "Gee, Rich, you are such a nice guy. I wish I could find a boyfriend who is just like you." Of course I wanted to grab them and say, "So, then why won't you date ME?!?!" (yeah, I hear a lot of you laughing, but you must remember I was so much more introverted than I am now)
Also, growing up, I would experience times when people I knew would complain about how alone they felt, how they had no friends, how they wished someone would listen to them (hell, that still happens now). Wow, doesn't that make me feel unappreciated. They didn't want anyone, they wanted someone specific and it wasn't me.
I now find myself in a situation where it is I who desires an emotional bond, without seeing those who are willing to be there with me. What drives us to create an ideal we cannot achive and turn away from those who help us???
I procrastinated and had to "cheat" on my weekly assignment for ENT101. I was supposed to watch any news broadcast dealing with business and do a write-up about it and how it would affect me. Instead, I went online and looked-up the stories that were shown on a CNBC program and read the summaries.
Disapointingly, I did not do my share of the group project this week either. I will have to pull double duty for next week... PLUS finish writing my mid-term paper by the 25th.
That's all for now. |
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| continued from last night |
[Sep. 18th, 2007|02:02 pm] |
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I should have added at the end of my previous post, that the feelings and thoughts I was having last night were... temporary. Nothing like the month-long depression that affected me back in June. By the time I got home and had a snack, I was feeling "normal". |
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| Must stop being lazy |
[Sep. 17th, 2007|10:40 pm] |
This past weekend I let many opportunities to do schoolwork pass-by and instead spent time on the internet. The same for this morning, this afternoon, and even now.
Today started good, but I am now emotionally craptacular. I don't want to say that the following is what started everything, because it didn't. But, it did place thoughts in my head. evilest_kitten and I were IMing as we usually do when we got on the subject of FDO people. We shared our thoughts about certain aspects of personalities and actions. What I wrote at the tim was just the stuff off the top of my head... but later on...
Work was the usual up and back to the airport. But, at the very end I got a call saying that I had to do one more run that would push me past my usual finish time of 8pm. Crap! I was supposed to have WDL rehersal. Anyway, when I got off, there was no chance of me driving to Wilmington for less than an hour of I-Don't-Know-What. So, I decided to go to the Deer Park for Monday Night Football.
Expecting to get complimentary hot dogs, wings, and meatballs, I ordered a beer and sat to watch the game. I soon learned that a banquet upstairs was utilizing all the chaffing dishes, so there was no free food. I didn't want to spend money on over-priced tavern food. Decided to go to grocery store for some essentials: bolognia, cheese, bread, and other stuff.
While walking down the isles... I got a strange forboding sensation. I felt very depressed and very alone. My roommate has not yet paid me the full ammount of his rent for September. I'm gong to have to confront him about that soon.
I have not had the chance to hang-out with wookiemonster and evilest_kitten for a long, long time. Am I still their friend?
I spent a lot of money these past two weeks and not been tracking my finances. Will I be able to pay bills for October?
Why am I feeling alone when I have friends?
Are they really my friends or just casual aquaintences who act like friends?
Should I talk to theoneblue about his server idea? I need the money, but don't want to push him.
Am I really going to start my own business?
I have failed at so much in the past I will probably fail again.
I'm going to fail the entrepreneurship class if I don't start writing my mid-term.
I haven't been to the gym in over a week... I'm going to put all that weight back on.
I don't like Wes talking about Kitten as if she is some posession to be traded...
I realize that evilest_kitten and I have shifted our relationship and that we are looking at each other from opposite sides of a fence. We became 3rd party middle-men in a struggle that should not have to be.
Life was good last year: Diner with Kitten and Dave, work, hang-out with Kitten and Dave, FDO, do stuff with Kitten while Dave was with Robin, repeat.
So what happens to the boy who wants to keep playing tag outside when everyone else has decided to move indoors and play Monopoly? |
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| Hurrah for Cold-Eeze!!! |
[Sep. 15th, 2007|01:53 pm] |
Thursday, I started to feel a tickle in the back of my throat and IMMEDIATELY started taking Cold-Eeze. Friday, I had a sore throat and some post-nasal drip, keep popping the CEZ. Today (saturday) throat is fine, just some minor congestion, still using CEZ. I should be all better by tomorrow.
I really wish my family would plan things more in advance. I misiter calls me on Friday afternoon to invite me to my nephew's b-day at Red Lobster, 3:30pm on Saturday (today). Luckily I had nothing special planned... but what if I did? (actually, I did have plans but it was just personal stuff) She has done this before, also my mother and brother call me for last-minute stuff as well. It would be nice to have more than 24hr notice for family events.
that's all for now |
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| Mmmmmm... |
[Sep. 15th, 2007|12:08 am] |
Becky had a party at her place tonight (friday). I feel very good right now :) and very sad you (yes, you) were not there.
I love everyone I know.
(Holy crap! I didn't think I was THAT drunk)
;)
Time for bed, bitches. (Quarterly meeting for work at 8:30am) |
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| DAMN IT!!! |
[Sep. 14th, 2007|08:17 pm] |
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The number one reason I hate Oktoberfest is that it is called OKTOBER-fest. Yet, it is held in September. Once again, I forgot to plan for it and will not be able to attend. Too many other commitments and I don't know what other people are doing. I missed the boat again. |
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| you gotta go where the money is |
[Sep. 12th, 2007|12:21 pm] |
Entrepreneurship class was ok this morning. Again, the class is not what I thought it would be, yet at the same time I am learning a lot. Mr.Smart-Ass in the back of the room started cracking his jokes again. But, thankfully, this time the instructor stopped him. He started again later and she then asked him to stay after class for a discussion about his attitude.
YAY!!!
As for the money comment in the subject line... I had left my phone charging in my bedroom this morning. When I got to work, my supervisor comments, "I guess you didn't get my message". Turns out he wants me to work 3pm-11pm tonight. By doing this I will get 3+ runs to the airport rather than 1 this afternoon. It was a voluntary decision and I said I would dod it (money is money). Luckily, WDL rehersal only invloved the main characters tonight and the chorus was off. Kinda nice how these things can work themselves together.
But, that leaves me with 3 hours to kill. I tried to contact some people for lunch, but no luck. I will probably pop-in a movie and do some interwebbing. |
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| a big HURRAH for procrastination |
[Sep. 12th, 2007|12:18 am] |
I just finished the last of my weekly assignments for my Wednesday morning class. After reviewing my other assignments... I am wondering if my instructor passes-out good grades like they are water? It just feels like the work is too easy. Or at least easier than what I remember from UD. I do know that I am behind on my mid-term project (due next week), and I am not looking forward to my final group project.
I don't even know why I bothered to make this post when I should be going to bed. |
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| camera dump |
[Sep. 11th, 2007|06:34 pm] |
I just uploaded a crap-load of random pics from my camera to my laptop. Some of them are many months old and I don't know if I ever posted them for your enjoyment.
( WARNING: lots o pics )
That's all for now |
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